有人曾问：“你越来越沉默的原因是什么？”其中一个回答说：“有时候，你被人误解，却不想争辩；有时候，你被人找茬，却不屑反击；有时候，你不是不知道，只是不想说，于是选择了沉默。”很多时候，沉默并不代表懦弱与妥协，而是隐忍之下的大度从容。是洞穿世事而体谅，看淡是非而不争，悟透人生而沉着。 李维金 摄In times of success, do not flaunt your happiness.

Maugham said in "The Moon and Sixpence":

"What you need to overcome is your vanity, your desire to show off, and that little cleverness of yours that's always eager to steal the spotlight."

Happiness can be shared, but constant bragging not only fails to win admiration from others, it also invites resentment and dislike.

I once read a news story that went like this:

Ms. Guo from a certain county joined an old classmates' chat group after her daughter finished the college entrance examination.

Every day, she would post in the group chat, either sharing photos of her daughter or praising how outstanding she is.

After receiving the admission letter from Tsinghua University, Ms. Guo immediately shared it in the group chat, saying, "The admission letter from Tsinghua University is truly impressive."

She had hoped to receive a wave of compliments, but unexpectedly, the class monitor kicked her out of the group.

Angrily, she went to confront the class monitor, only to find out that she had already been deleted by them.

What made her even angrier was that after she was kicked out of the group, most of her classmates actually said, "She should have been kicked out long ago."

Ms. Guo was both puzzled and aggrieved: "Why does everyone dislike me so much?"

Actually, it makes sense if you think about it carefully.

When the college entrance exam results come out, some families will be overjoyed while others will be heartbroken. Constantly flaunting your child's achievements is essentially rubbing salt in others' wounds.

In "U Can U Bibi," a guest once said: If you can live in a way that makes people like you, don't live in a way that makes them envy you.

To live well may be luck, but to live without being a nuisance is a remarkable skill.

Truly outstanding individuals often do not flaunt their abilities or boast loudly; instead, they remain low-key, cautious, and humble.

An old saying goes: "The hard breaks; the soft survives."

Joy without words is a philosophy of self-preservation in life, and even more so, a sign of inner strength.

Not caring about others' opinions, nor needing others' approval to prove oneself.

On the journey of life, learning to temper one's锋芒, cherish the present, and be grateful for what one has allows one to reap spiritual abundance in silence. 不解释，是最合理的解释有位文友吐槽过自己的一段经历。前两年，因为厌倦了朝九晚五的生活，他辞掉了国企的安稳工作，回家全职做新媒体。虽然过程辛苦，经常熬夜，但是能做自己热爱的事情，也出了成绩，很开心。偏偏有几个邻居总是时不时地议论他，说他游手好闲，不务正业，连好好的铁饭碗都弄丢了。一开始他也尝试着跟别人解释，什么是自由职业，后来时间长了，便干脆不再搭理。文友说：“有些人只愿意活在自己的世界里，既然解释不通，何必多说。”生活中，很多人也曾经历过这样的情况：在单位与领导私下交好，有的同事便说你趋炎附势；在朋友圈分享出国旅行的照片，有人就认为你是变相炫富；辞职回家创业，邻里便传言你在大城市过得很不如意......好多时候，事实并非眼前所见，但我们却百口莫辩。但如果怎么都解释不清楚，不如缄口不言，保持沉默。真正懂得你的人，即使你不言不语，也能心知意会；而不懂你的人，纵然你喋喋不休，亦如鸡同鸭讲。“有时解释是不必要的：敌人不信你的解释，朋友无须你的解释。”每个人都有自己的价值观，这世间悲喜并不相通，被误解是常态，被理解才是特例。与其拼命向别人解释自己，不如保持沉默，让时间回应一切。沉默，是一个人的体面王小波说：“从话语中，你很少能学到人性，从沉默中却能。假如还想学得更多，那就要继续一声不吭。”做人，需要体面，真正的体面，就是哪怕你沉默了，沉默地对待一切，也让人觉得值得尊重和认可。可以说，真正的强大，在于内心的强大，在于心境的强大。然后才能够在面对人世间的所有苦难和艰难的时候，依旧能够把自己经营得很好。如此，把自己修炼得更强大，更成功，在沉默当中，活得更从容，更惬意。很喜欢作家三毛的那句话：“世间的人和事，来和去都有它的时间，我们只需要把自己修炼成最好的样子，然后静静地去等待就好了。”人生在世，苦也好，乐也罢，难也好，易也罢。总之，面对人生的坎坎坷坷，是非恩怨，以及所谓的得失成败，我们其实也可以拿出沉默的心态，强者的心境，一点点去强大自己，独立起来。沉默，不是对世事妥协、对命运怯懦，而是豁达面对人生起伏，笑而不语、痛而不言。沉默，不是无话可说，而是要在蛰伏中，让自己远离世间纷扰，默默积淀，蓄势待发。人这一生，会说话是艺术，而适时沉默，却是为人处世的大格局。往后余生，少说话，多做事，学会用沉默代替杂音，在不动声色中强大自己。

中国新闻社（CNS1952）综合自洞见、洞读、有书
编辑：梁静
审校：魏园责编：宋方灿

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All relationships deteriorate because of these three words.

						](http://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MjM5NDI2MDc5NA==&mid=2659566863&idx=1&sn=c0b5ae223a98aecd659de233116566c9&chksm=bdfb175a8a8c9e4c35856ee2ced91433764d165fc91196e27a73b1c53fbdb26da0d59dbed8bd&scene=21#wechat_redirect)
					


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A person who knows how to speak wins the moment they open their mouth.

						](http://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MjM5NDI2MDc5NA==&mid=2659566524&idx=1&sn=2cf4a8e6b19555048b6433c91a8519f1&chksm=bdfb11e98a8c98ff4d87f67690733be50e9e8cd3e20e63cebbc9daaabc6a2a2de9f2f7ea60b5&scene=21#wechat_redirect)
					


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How long will it take for Lady Shiji to make a comeback in the East Mountain?

						](http://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MjM5NDI2MDc5NA==&mid=2659565926&idx=1&sn=7a05e35a830cdd70e9cc5174a19116f8&chksm=bdfb13338a8c9a250b771d6e1ac3cadd8b199efea137dfdf46238927353f1e691d5d0e2c18e9&scene=21#wechat_redirect)